Being Thankful

Find one thing to be thankful for each day, 

even if the skies are grey,

and you’ll find a moment of happiness,

to chase your blues away.

And for all of our dear US readers, 

Happy Thanksgiving! 

With Thanks and Gratitude, Dear Readers

In this week of Thanks and Giving, I'm grateful for:

• The unwavering support of my family. 
• The forthright critiques of my CP, Jenn Stark.
• The diligence and attention to detail of my editors Linda Ingmanson and Toni Lee.  
• The creativity of my cover artist and his team at Gene Mollica, LLC.
• The insight and persistence of my co-bloggers here at the SFF Seven.
• The dear readers of this blog and of my books.

Happy [early] Thanksgiving 

[for the US readers].

To Self, with Gratitude

Our topic here at the SFF Seven this week is "With Gratitude: Shout Out to someone who makes you a better author (peer, editor, reviewer, SO, pet, etc.)."

Mine is weird, I know - but it dovetails with what I've been talking about the last couple of days on my First Cup of Coffee podcast - and it's on my mind.

I don't mean to imply that there aren't a whole host of people out there deserving of a shout-out for all they've done for me. I'm truly wealthy in wonderful friends, family, and colleagues. In fact, I have the great fear we all suffer, that if I were to list them, I'd forget someone fatally important.

But I think it's also critically important to remember to have gratitude for our selves. I've been talking about the subconscious creative self - which is something every one of us has, whether we're actively engaged in an art or not. Our subconscious is the self without words or timelines, that connects to a realm our conscious brains cannot. Sometimes it's easier to think of the subconscious self like a beloved dog or cat. We have a loving and nurturing relationship with it, one that flows both directions. And, just like with our pets, it responds best to affection, not criticism.

Also, as with our pets, they don't always do what we think we want them to do - and the surprises give us the greatest delights.

So, I'm taking a moment today to express gratitude to my subconscious creative self, which has labored long and faithfully to feed me stories to write down. I'm truly grateful for all the blessings in my life.

Hope you all have blessings and reasons for gratitude also.

Six Quick Points of Advice on Being an Author

DepositPhoto

Technically this week’s topic is mentoring. I've always liked this quote:  “Mentoring is a brain to pick, an ear to listen, and a push in the right direction.” — John Crosby

In the old day job I definitely had mentors and owe a great deal to all of them. One thing I ran into, however, is expressed well by Steven Spielberg: “The delicate balance of mentoring someone is not creating them in your own image, but giving them the opportunity to create themselves.” Because I was a woman in a spot where there had been few if any women at that time, some of my early mentors at NASA/JPL  had definite ideas of who and what I should look like when I ‘made it’…and their vision didn’t always match mine. That was definitely my first chance to adopt the adage “Your Mileage May Vary” and there’s no one right way to do ANYTHING.

Later in my career there I participated in the formal mentoring program at NASA/JPL, for which we had training, ‘contracts’ between the mentor and mentee, a time limit and a lot of structure. I also informally mentored a great many people. Having been one of the first women in management in my particular specialized business area of the Lab, I had insights to share and I wanted to pay forward the wonderful help I’d received from my own mentors.

As an author, I’ve had several wonderful mentors, who shared their experiences with me and to whom I’d turn if something happened I wasn’t sure how to handle. Our own Jeffe Kennedy is one of my primary mentor resources to this day! Susan ‘SE’ Smith is another terrific fount of advice and support, generous with her time.

I do some mentoring of other authors if I’m asked a question or to give a presentation. I belong to a variety of online author groups and I’ll weigh in on the discussion if I feel I have something to contribute from my experiences or from things I’ve observed in the scifi romance world. I think my main message usually boils down to: There’s no one way! Everyone has their own path and their own definition of success.

Here are some points from the speech I gave a few years ago to a Los Angeles-are writing group, which represent my basic approach to giving general advice:

First we need to pause and acknowledge that finishing a book is a HUGE accomplishment and deserves celebration and kudos. So few people actually manage to complete that first book, although so many talk about writing a book ‘someday’, or may even write a few pages and find out what hard work it can be and stop. So if you’ve completed that first book, take a moment to bask in the well-deserved happy feels.

But then the author needs to ask where on the spectrum of expectations they fall. Is this the book of their heart, the one and only book they ever want to create and just having it available on Amazon for friends and relatives to buy will truly be enough? Holding that paperback version is a thrill all right. So if the book sits at #3,000,000 in Amazon forever they’ll be ok with it? Or are they secretly hoping to become J. K. Rowling someday, with billions of readers and theme parks and movies and so forth? I think we’d all like to be that person and yes, someone does win the lotto and yes, a few authors do rise to that level…but there’s nothing specific you can do right now to become JKR.

So accept that you fall into the middle of the spectrum with most of us authors and realize writing is a business and you’re going to have to treat it as such.

First, you have to have a social media presence. How are readers going to find you and your book if you aren’t out there to be found? No, magical thinking doesn’t qualify as a strategy, especially nowadays with the huge volume of books being published every week. If your book hovers around #3,000,000 in ranking, readers are not going to stumble over it.

 I always encourage authors to find the social media that works for them and where they feel comfortable. Even if they aren’t yet published, they have interesting lives, hobbies, fan favorites, general book talk they can share. And the internet always loves a good cat picture or two!

The one thing I strongly urge a writer to have is a blog or a website. There needs to be a central point a reader can go to learn about you, your books, what’s coming next and when, and a way to contact the author. Yes, you can have an Author Page on Amazon and also collect followers on BookBub after publication – I do both – but that real estate doesn’t belong to you. You don’t even know who those readers are and the company can change its business practices on a dime. So have one internet spot that’s all yours!  Your first internet presence doesn’t have to be full of bells and whistles and expensive.

Six more quick points of advice?

Develop a thick skin because this is a business.

Never engage with reviewers, especially over a negative review.

Find a group of likeminded writers, on Facebook or wherever, for encouragement and tips and cross promo!

Practice self-care, physically and mentally.

Don’t compare your journey to any other author’s because everyone’s path is different.

Most important: Stay true to your own voice!

When I saw the topic for the week here, I realized I do very little mentoring as a self-published author. Certainly not like it was in the old day job, where my office door was always open and I was happy to sit and chat. Pondering this today, I think in part it’s because most of my interactions nowadays are online.

For health reasons I don’t travel to conferences any more either, so I don’t actually meet too many people in real life these days!

Many of the answers a person new to self-publishing might be seeking can be found in the rich archives of the various author groups on Facebook, with people willing to answer or advise on more complex issues as they arise. Find one or two or more of these groups that feel like they might be on your wavelength and lurk and search their old posts…if asked, I do my best to steer people to the groups I’ve found that work for me but there’s a much larger universe out there than the few I frequent nowadays.

I’m pretty much set in my path, writing what I write, publishing and doing promo the way I’ve found works best for me and my readers and prospective readers…

General advice and periodic posts on my blog are the way I roll nowadays, as far as providing mentoring.

My latest release:

Amazon      Apple Books      Kobo     Nook    GooglePlay

In Praise of Mentors

When faced with something you have to do, but don't know how to do, what DO you do? Maybe YouTube a how-to? Cause there are a metric crap ton of vids on any topic you can imagine (and a few you can't). There are arcane and amazingly useful channels out there. Then there are the videos that are clearly some desperate marketing 'guru' wanting to entice you into SPECIAL FOR YOU TODAY pricing on their amazing class that will teach you everything you ever needed to know about <insert topic, including writing, here>.

Some writers have channels that are legitimately helpful, but for writing mentorship, I lean on organizations. The single most cost effective way to learn about this industry while participating in the industry is to pay dues to RWA, SFWA, NINC, and other writer organizations that bring writers with all levels of experience together. Had I not found and joined RWA when I did, I'd still be out wandering in the novelist woods wondering why nothing was working.

Chapter meetings taught me the difference between internal and external conflict. It was at meetings that I finally figured out what voice was. When my first rejection letter came in, my chapter mates broke it down for me, explaining what the editor was telling me and how encouraging that rejection actually was. Chapter meetings and local writer conferences led me to classes and to the people who's working style meshed with and enhanced my own. Do you know how much that would cost if I'd tried to get that kind of support and education from a single person? Far, far more than I had. Then or now.

Writer organizations give you access to an incredibly deep well of experience and information. I can go to the email loops or forums, ask literally any question and have germane answers within a day. All for the price of a membership. In that regard, I am super pro-mentorship. Take advantage of the organizations to which you belong and do what you can to give back, whether that's through serving on a board, or volunteering to stuff goodie bags at a conference.

It's vital to recognize, though, that mentorships have drawbacks. First, no one can do the work for you. Second, when anyone talks 'how to', you aren't getting The One True Way. You're getting the speaker's way. Whatever the teacher/speaker is sharing is what works for them. It may not work for you. When you're the one learning, it pays to keep in mind that you're going to classes in order to try out tools to see how or whether they fit your hand. When you find what fits, seek out that instructor and take every last one of their classes. The point is to take what fits and chuck the rest.  In that way, you become your own best mentor.

To be, or not to be, a mentor.

Are you:

1. working your way through NaNoWriMo and your first book
2. querying or researching the indie track
3. have a book or two out in the world, ready to create the next one
4. been in publishing long enough you feel confident in the ins and outs

For the A’s - I’ve got loads of encouragement, and a slew of cheesy quotes if you’re interested. 

For the B’s - I’ve got encouragement and some tips on where to find information. 

For the C’s - I’ve got encouragement and a pretty good set of reader’s eyes. For the D’s - I’ve got encouragement, and a few questions. 

When I started writing, I believed it was a solo expedition, but then I realized that I wasn’t an astronaut. Lone wolf is the term more frequently used, but wolves operate in packs because the strength is in the pack. And that’s true of authors as well.

That understanding changed the game for me. Instead of being alone in a void, I found a writing community filled with people as clueless as I was, only the members were at all levels of their careers. Even when I didn’t think I could contribute I found people coming along behind me looking for suggestions on things I’d just done or gone through, and my voracious reading matched up with others needing a fresh set of eyes on their work.

No matter which letter you picked, you’ve got something to offer. Did you notice I listed encouragement with each one? That’s because everyone, no matter their level of achievements, has bad days, rejections, doubt, and thousands of other life challenges. So join in, even if it’s to offer a smile. Because if we’re all out there together, we may as well be having fun.

Wanted: A DumbleYoda of My Very Own

A couple weeks ago, I tried to sign up to get a mentor through the SFWA, but the slots were all full within, like, an hour of the thing going live. That’s how starved we are for information.

We = all of us who are trying to do this writing thing. Having published a book or signed with an agent does not confer magical status of “I got this all covered now.” Many of us are confused and periodically hopeless.

Starved = sort of ironic, given how many YouTube vids there are for How To Self-Publish Your Book And Make A Gazillion Dollars Doing It! Easy! Everybody Can! I’m not saying they’re all scams trying to get you to pay for a magical placebo. But, um, caveat emptor.

And yet, I still tried to sign up for that  mentorship program, didn’t I? See, I wish there was a magic pill for How Do I Do This? I’m Rey, telling Luke that something has awakened inside me—this incredible urge to tell stories—and I need to know my place in all this and I’m begging Luke to train me and help me make sense of it, and every single day Luke takes one look at my lightsaber and throws it off a cliff. Every. Single. Day.

The bottom line is that as much as I yearn for a Dumbledore or a Yoda to give a crap about my journey and tell me when I’m doing it wrong—and when I’m doing it right—that ain’t gonna happen.  There is no such thing as a wisefolk out in the world who are even half as invested in your success as you are.

So, basically, be your own mentor. Learn your own thing. And message me if you need to scream/vent/rage into the void because this whole gig is confusing and cyclically horrifying, and we are all just flailing here. Sometimes it’s helpful to share.

Mentoring: Would I, Could I, Should I, Have I?

Oh, so you want to know about mentoring, dear reader? Well, here's KAK's 5 Quick Mentoring Hits:

• Have I ever "officially" mentored an author at any stage of their career? 
• Nope. Not because I'm a dick (opinions may vary on that). Mostly, it's because there are moments when we (authors) need advice but it's not a sustained state of apprenticeship. Also, the needs fluctuate from 0 to 60 to -12. I may be the experienced one in April, but by August the mentee probably is the new expert. Roles flip. It's a good thing. It encourages continuous education.

• Am I available to answer questions or offer advice? 
• Sure. All advice comes with the standard disclaimer of "YMMV." While I'm happy to answer questions, don't expect me to do the work for you. Yes, I have strong opinions about certain topics and fluid thoughts on others. Yes, I can be and have been wrong. Yes, I am big enough to admit when that happens.

• Do I consider myself an expert on any one aspect of authoring?
• Oh hell no. I'm passably good at some things and a bit of a penny-in-the-socket on others.

• Ever considered sharing what you've learned in your decade+ of playing in the publishing arena?
• That's the biggest reason this blog exists. Authors at various stages of their careers can read our seven different perspectives on topics ranging from writing compelling sidekicks with fetishes to negotiating for yourself in an industry focused on their bottom line. From pre-published to self-published to hybrid published to traditionally published, this blog comes at the issues from all avenues and across the spec-fic and romance genres. 

• Would you ever want someone to mentor you?
• Who wouldn't want a resource who's been there, done that, and done it with better success? Then again, as Jeffe mentioned on Sunday, a lot of that kind of mentorship comes from friendships with other authors. I value my friendships, heck, it increases the odds I'll listen to their advice. 👼