Sum Total of the Goals

I hope a bright and happy solstice was had by all and that the forthcoming holidays will also delight you and yours.

Do y'all remember back to January of this year? I only barely do. Apparently, I went on a rant against the abomination that is Western Civilization's obsession with New Year's Resolutions. It was my screed against listing out goals for other peoples' consumption and/or guilt-making. And though I was ranting against the load we seem to want to place upon ourselves with goals and resolutions and all manner of betterment (as if we aren't enough in and of ourselves) it turns out that ranting against goals is actually making them. They went something like this:

1. Pledge to be gentle with yourself - adopt a policy of nonviolence in thought, word, and deed concerning yourself. Seriously. Just listen to how you think at yourself. You will be horrified by what you hear.
2. Make time and space for doing nothing at all. It needn't be much time. Fifteen minutes a day. Not for meditation. Not for reading. Not for yet another course on how to do or be The Thing. To do nothing. Most of us have forgotten leisure and how to be alone.
3. Vow to help someone else. Whether you volunteer on a regular basis or just offer a cup of coffee to the homeless kid on the corner once in a while - totally up to you. But if you want the cure for a bad day, bring a smile to someone else's face.

How'd I do with these? Erm. Uh. Okay? I guess? The first one lasted for maybe a week before I fell back into old, nasty habit. I am still working on that. Too much research in the world proves that negative feedback does not produce results. Being mean and calling yourself names in your head does not do the job you want it to do. It produces little to no motivation. Positive motivations (having something to shoot for that matters to you) is far more productive. Reprogramming one's brain to DO that is not the easiest. Let's call this a work in progress.

I did nail the last two. Self defense on finding time to do nothing. Migraine sufferers know something about that - usually after a major migraine, you spend several hours, one the pain and sickness are gone, just looking around. Going through life gently. Yes. It is in fear of the migraine returning. But the point is that taking a few minutes each day to do nothing is now part of my self-care.

Helping someone else - Ballard has a population of homeless folks. You get to know who they are and you get to know their needs. So making sure that there are extra hot drinks on cold days, or a box of feminine hygiene products left for the young woman on the street with her partner - those things are easy to do. Supporting Best Friends and Big Cat Rescue with 10% of every dime I make is my other thing. But my favorite was seeing a young woman walking the street in the greatest, should be in a movie, velvet trench coat (bright scarlet). I was behind her and her friend. They went into a restaurant. I followed and touched her elbow. The two women turn to look at me. Faces blank. I said, "Truly epic coat." The gal's friend grinned, pumped her and crowed, "Told you!" The young woman in the coat lit up. Lit up so bright it brought tears to my eyes. Dumb, huh? But it happened. I liked that. Think I'll put it on my list for next year - to see if I can make someone's day like that at least once.

KAK's 2016 Goals in Review

Ah, the 2016 Goals. I was so ambitious. I came close to achieving some of my Big 5; others I missed by a mile. Fortunately, there's always 2017, right?

End of Year (EOY) progress updates in-line in purple italics.

1) Achieve Balance -- This is a lifestyle goal that affects my writing, both in quality and quantity. As a control freak, it is very easy for me to obsess to the point of counter-productivity, even harm. Balance is my go-to word, my mantra reminding me to back out of the weeds and end the vicious cycle. Balance in all things. Mind & Body. Active & Repose. Creative & Analytical. Social & Solitary. Spirituality Without & Within. I've reached that stage in life where it's not about More being More or Less being More, it's about achieving Balance and living joyfully within its fluid state.

EOY: While I'm better at this than I was at the beginning of the year, I didn't come as far as I'd hoped. I'm too much a devotee of sloth and distractions.

2) Write Four Novels -- Three released during the year, one in the throes of professional edits by EOY. As an author-publisher, I can control 90% of the timing of the releases. The catches, however, are goals 3 & 4.

EOY: Oh gods, I really wished had nailed this one. Instead, I completed writing/editing one book (still have to go through the cover art process), have another ready for CP review (one step away from professional edits), and a third chasing its tail in the draft of the first arc. I tracked the had babits that derailed me, so at least I'm wiser on that front. I also learned I can probably do three novels in a year, but not quite four. We'll see if I'm right about me in 2017.

3) Establish More Realistic Estimates for Writing an Editor-Ready Novel -- I'm a slow writer who has yet to establish a baseline of time needed to write a 125k novel.  I've written one in as little as 45 days and another in as long as 7 years. Thanks to the advice of my fellow bordello-mates offered in posts here on the blog, I've a better plan of attack.

EOY: That referenced plan of attack? First casualty of the year. I think I made it to March before it went up in smoke. Mores the pity, because my fellow SFFers are pretty damn smart and very open about their processes.   

4) Be in the Black for the P&L of Publishing -- This one I can only somewhat control. Much of it depends on the sales of published book(s). It's one thing to write two, six, or twelve books a year; it is something else entirely to finance the all the bits that come between writing and release day. Owning the costs, of course, is the downside of being an author-publisher.

EOY: If I didn't hit Goal #2, I had no chance of hitting this one. I have a feeling I won't hit this goal until 2018.

5) Complete a Reasonable Number of Honey-Dos -- I've a long list of Want To Do, Like To Do, and Need To Do things that take time away from writing, yet are necessary if I want to avoid turning feral. This ties back to the goal of Balance. I won't bore you with details of caulking, decluttering, etc., at least until the end of the year.

EOY: I did well on this one. Perhaps a little too well since I didn't hit the writing goals. Reckon this goes back to Goal #1. Looks like I have another point of balance to strike. 

Cheers to Health & Happiness in this new year!

And in 2017. May we all survive the coming apocalypse!