Leveling Up - Whether We Want To or Not

This week at the SFF Seven we're asking each other: do you look for new skills to try each year? Or with each book?

My first reaction is that this isn't an annual process for me, but an ongoing one. Because it's absolutely something that happens with every book. And not because I plan it that way! Quite the reverse. With 65 published titles, I often go into new books thinking something along the lines of "This one will be a fast and easy write because x, y, z."

I am, inevitably, always always wrong.

That's not to say that some books don't write easier than others, but they all pose unique problems. It seems to be the nature of the beast, that the creative process goes to a new and more challenging place every time. 

I have two caveats to this:

1. I do kind of look at this on a yearly basis because of my agent, Sarah Younger at Nancy Yost Literary Agency, who sets up annual chats with all of her clients at the beginning of each year. (She jokes that she has to dig some clients out of their caves once a year for this. You know who you are.) I really love this about Sarah because it's part of what she brings to the table: long-term career strategy. She says she keeps a goal book for each of her clients and we revisit those goals and set new ones each year. For me, a big part of this conversation is always how can I grow and expand? What do I need to do to level up?
2. The second caveat is that I save some ideas for when I have the chops to execute them. Writers often talk about (and are asked) where they get their ideas and how we choose what to write next. (See above for that.) For many of us, ideas arrive all the time, but that doesn't mean we're ready to write them. The second novel I ever wrote was like that - only I didn't know that I didn't have the chops to execute the concept. So, over the years, I've gradually been adding skills as the stories demand them. In Shadow Wizard, book one of the Renegades of Magic trilogy, I added extra points-of-view (POVs). That was the first time I wrote in more than two POVs. In book three of that trilogy, Twisted Magic, I had five POVs. Who knows where it will end??

Except that someday (maybe?), I'd like to go back and rewrite that second novel. I bet I could pull it off this time.

 

Goodbye 2023

My husband and I smiling goodbye to 2023!

It’s been a year. I spent countless hours at my kid’s sport events. Read 78 books. Wrote one sci-fi thriller. And I’m excited about 2024. I’ve got goals and I’m going to reach them. 

The new year is right around the corner. It’s a time to look forward in anticipation. It’s also a time that many make resolutions. Resolutions, goals, whatever you want to call them, they’re good motivators. And if you’ve been looking for the push, the thing that’ll energize you, now is a great time to decide that it’s going to happen now. 

A positive mindset can carry you a long way. I was reminded of that as I watched the most recent season of Alone with my family. If you're not familiar with it, it's a reality show from the History Channel that pits people against the wilderness and their own minds as they survive out in the woods alone. The woman who stuck it out to the number two spot was incredibly positive and grateful throughout the experience. She outlasted her competitors, who brought in more game, with berries and a smile. Watching her daily lift her face to the sky reminded me that I want to face 2024 with a grin. 

That’s my plan as I prepare for the new year. I hope your New Year celebration is safe and filled with joy and laughter, but also brings you a good dose of grit for your goals. 

Starting Off Right

 You've had excellent advice from those who've written about starting stories so far. I second everything they've said. I'm coming at beginnings from a slightly different angle because for me, a beginning need do only one thing: Make me care.

I want to care. It's why I pick up a book with hope in my heart. I want to care about the story. I want to care about the characters. Making me care is a a three step process folded into the beginning of your story.

First tell me the goals. What does the character want? Even if they're wrong about what they think they want in the beginning of the book, what is that? The sooner I know what that is, the sooner I can identify with that character. I don't need to like the character. The character doesn't even have to be human. I just need to appreciate what they want. Usually there's some truth or universality to whatever this character wants or needs and that's enough to hook me in if you're communicating it via that character's unique voice.

Second, tell me the stakes. I need to know very quickly what's at stake in a story both internally for the character and externally for the character and the world of the story. What does this character stand to lose? This sounds like the answer should be 'well, they either get their goal or they don't' and I assure you that is NOT the answer. The answer is deeper than that. It's connected to a core wound in the character - whatever this character lacks inside themselves that makes them want what they want. It's connected to this character's faulty belief systems. The hard part is that at the beginning of the story, characters don't know they have wounds of any kind, much less faulty belief systems. Still, in the beginning of a story, I need the faintest whiff of what the character lacks. Maybe she's the sole survivor of a space ship wreck. It's been awhile. No one's coming to save her. S'okay, though. She's carved out a means of survival. Lonely? Sure. Sure. But, you know. She wasn't the the type to be belle of anyone's ball so it didn't much matter. This was peaceful. Lots of time for figuring out how to make paint from local resources and painting anything that stands still long enough - oh, hey. Is that a shooting star? Or -- holy shit. A ship. What's at stake for this character? Loneliness. Isolation. Companionship. Belonging. Possibly, if it's a romance, what's at stake is being proven wrong about not being the type to be the belle of anyone's ball.

Finally, tie is all up in a bow and tell me why. Why do the goals and the stakes matter? This is where promises are made. I won't say kept, because promises made at the beginning of a book are rarely kept through to the end of the book - at least, not those about plot or character or goals or even stakes. Word to the wise, though. You might want to keep your genre promises. The why gives me a hint about how the goals and the stakes are going to start generating conflict. Painter girl from above has lots of potential stakes. It's possible she had a goal before the shipwreck - get an important secret somewhere to stop a war. Without a ship and without rescue, that goal is null and void. She had to switch to a single goal: survival. Once that was secured, she could expand to becoming the greatest painter in the world which, notably, only she inhabits. Another ship coming in long after she'd given up ever getting off the rock, opens the door for you, the author, to tell me just how screwed our poor, cast away heroine is. Either that ship is crashing, too, and she's just going to bury more bodies but maybe she can repair the ship, or they land, leap out and shout, "Millions have died! You had one job! Where's the secret thing??" or it's some renegade band running from the law, trying to repair their ship, and they are not happy to see her, nor do they have any intention of getting her off world, or . . . I realize this may feel like the end of the beginning of a story. It isn't. It's the end of the inciting incident.

Which leads me to bonus points. Bonus points for starting on action. I may get hate for this. Or, possibly, you've clucked your tongue, rolled your eyes, and said, 'not every genre can do that'. Yes, my friend. They can. Action, when we speak of story, isn't all about guns and car chases and explosions or ships falling from the sky. Action is about collision. Character in stasis (normal life) + inciting incident (whatever sideswipes them) = action.

In this case, character with goal + stakes (why that goal matters to them) + inciting incident (ship falling from sky) = mental, emotional, and physical chaos.

I'm here for it. Bring it. The faster I can scoop that up like ice cream, the happier I am.

Beginnings of stories must do a bunch of things all at once, yes. Your dawning awareness that there are far more than just three things that beginnings must do is - yeah. Beginnings are tough and you may be shocked to find that ton of authors leave until last. No joke. There's a lot of pressure on your beginning and on you. Some of the best advice I ever had was to start a story where I knew what was happening. Sometimes that's the middle. Sometimes the end. Occasionally, it's the beginning. But, when I don't know a beginning, I can figure out what it needs to be based on how the story ends. So. Never be afraid to say 'I don't know' about a beginning. Get to the end. See where everyone ends. Then you can work backward to a starting point for your characters. You'll have their change arc already in place.

Managing My Word Count

Over the years, my habits for managing my word count have changed. What works one season doesn't always work another. But, even so, there are a few things I keep in mind to keep myself on track.

Micro Goal

Writing every day is a part of my routine and part of what brings me calm. I also like the idea of having an easy win. It gets me in a good mood. And, even if it's a high pain day or a day when everything has gone wrong, I can count on getting this little bit of success.

That micro goal is just 200 words. 

If I get 200 words done, it counts as a win. 

Those 200 words can be on anything I want as long as I am writing. Most of the time, it's the story that I am most excited to write (which is rarely the story I am actually writing). If I'm feeling especially stagnant, I'll write by hand in one of my beautiful notebooks. 

The other advantage of these 200 words is that they give me a way to warm up. Most of the time, I work on this first thing in the morning over a cup of tea or coffee. 

Project Targets

I am always working on multiple projects. One is usually in editing and another is in drafting, at a minimum. I set aside time for both, and for the drafting, I decide how many words I need by looking at the target word count for my project and the number of days I have left before I need the draft done for revisions and editing. 

Now, because I am a planster (I plan but also change things as I go), I'm not always so good at knowing an accurate word count. This means that sometimes I have to adjust as I go along, and the needed word count goes up or down. 

At the end of each day, I see how many words I have drafted overall. I then break that down into the words that will be usable in the final draft versus those that wound up being more useful for understanding characters or might go into a future story (I don't always write chronologically). Then I look at my running total and compare it to where I need to be to figure out how much I need to write the following day. 

Sprinting for the Win

Perhaps one of the most helpful things in getting in the words is sprinting with friends. I absolutely love it, and it's so easy. You find a group, pick a time when at least one other person can show up, and you sprint for a time.

During this segment, your goal is to get the words down. No editing or critiquing. Just drafting.

At the end of your time, you all report in your word counts. Then, if you like, you go again. I have a couple friends I sprint with now almost every weekday. Sometimes for a couple hours at a time. It makes the drafting less lonely, and it also instills an added level of accountability. 

Ideal length of time varies. For me, 15 minutes is best. Anything longer than that, and I get antsy and need to stretch or move around.

Have Understanding for Delays and When Things Go Wrong

No matter what your goals are, make sure to give yourself some compassion in this journey. Don't chain yourself to those numbers, whatever they are. Yes, you may be in a time of tight deadlines in which you have to burn the candle at both ends and even in the middle. But that is not sustainable.

I know because I've been there and narrowly scraped through. And then it takes a long time to recover. 

So when making my plans for managing word counts, I now allow for things to go wrong. A friend loves to remind me that we never have to plan for things to go ideally. I'm still not certain how to factor delays in as well as I could because I am learning. But I try to only count on weekdays for writing (even though I do write on weekends) and lately I have been leaving at least two extra weeks for whatever needs to be done. 

The combination of micro and project goals allows me to meet the various deadlines, some of which are of my own creation and some of which are with other people. And they also help me to do it in a way that is sustainable and healthy while allowing me to reach my goals. 

What about you? How do you like to manage your word count and project goals?

 

Jessica M. Butler is a USA Today bestselling romantic fantasy author who never outgrew her love for telling stories and playing in imaginary worlds. She lives with her husband and law partner, James Fry, in rural Indiana where they are quite happy with their two cats and all of the wildlife and trees.

Accountability Goals: Words vs Chapters

 This Week's Topic: Managing Word Count

Do I write to hit a certain number?

Do I have a chapter/scene word allotment?

I have daily goals for word count in the drafting phase. Please note the absence of the phrase "net word count." Expecting consistently to add to the total tally sets me up for failure. Often, during the next day's re-read of the previous day's work, "What did I mean? That makes no sense!" and "That is some impressive plotless bunk, Krantz," cause my net word count to be negative. D'oh! Don't worry, rewrites don't equal a trip to the guilt guillotine for me. Certainly not in the drafting phase. I'd rather fix what's broken during drafting than during the editing phase. It saves LOTS of time in the long run.  

I have daily chapter goals in the editing phase. Some chapters don't need much revision while others have to be overhauled. I have a general sense of which arcs I can breeze through and which need a lot of work by the time I finish the first draft. My daily chapter goals reflect that. Note: this is in my editing phase, not the "professional editors have returned the marked-up mss" phase. 

When the professional editors return the marked-up mss to me, I attack that by type of revisions: the easy word tweaks vs character refinement vs plot thread redevelopment. My daily goals are based on the Level of Effort, not chapters or word count.

As for chapter/scene word allotments, they tie back to chapter word limits. I have limits because I can prattle with the best of them. /jk, sort of. Truly, it's to ensure I'm not info-dumping and killing the pace of the story. Also, reader expectations are different by subgenre. UF chapters tend to be shorter at ~2500wpc while HF chapters are ~5000wpc. Word count length on the chapters naturally influences any goals based on chapters. Theoretically, I can get through UF chapters faster because they're shorter than HF chapters. Theoretically...because a screwed-up UF chapter is going to take longer to fix than a clean HF chapter.

Now, you'll notice I didn't give numbers for each of the goals. It's not because I don't want to confess I'm a slow writer (long-time readers of this blog are well aware of that); rather, it's because the word/chapter count goals vary by book. Some stories are hard to write, while others are wham-bam-all-done-ma'am. Also, real-life obligations impact the goals. For example, I need to spend more time with my flesh-and-blood family and friends over the winter holiday season than with my fictional family and friends. I don't fight that, I plan for it. All my creative goals reflect that. 

Remember, goals should not be pathways to guilt. Reasonable expectations lead to reasonable goals.  Give yourself wiggle room. Overestimate the time it will take to hit milestones. If you finish early, you can reward yourself. The same thing applies if you hit your personal due date. If you don't hit your goals, then learn from the causes and apply the lessons to the next round of goal-setting. Don't beat yourself up. That will never help you.

My daily goals are my method of holding myself accountable for actually...working. Since I alone control my deadlines as a self-published author, I'm allowed this flexibility. If I fart around and don't accomplish what I've set out to do by the dates I've set out to have them done, then the one most hurt by that is me. I'm no dummy. I don't like to hurt. 

I'm too damn old for that kink. 

Wishing you a Glitter filled 2023!

As we watch the last sunsets of 2022 we’re sharing thoughts and blessings for the year to come.

There’s something refreshing about contemplating the year to come instead of pondering the year that has been. What has been has been, and what will be is still in formation. Have you put thought into your 2023?

Like Jeffe mentioned yesterday, over the past year I’ve realized that I do need people interaction. It’s been a few years since I’ve attended a con, and I miss it. Author friends get it in a way no one else can. Those relationships are precious and in the coming year I aim to give more time to them. I hope you have the bandwidth to put into author friendships, they’re worth all the effort. 

2023 will also be when I send out my next manuscript. There’s all sorts of scary wrapped up in that, but I refuse to be afraid of my shadow. It is time. 

And I’m going to continue to look for glitter, every day. It’s easy to let the no’s and negative stuff bring you down. I believe it’s important to focus on the good, every day. I hope your 2023 is filled with glitter, writing, and author friends! 

Happy New Year!

What the Future May Bring

 I usually have massive superstition around speaking my plans out into the open air. It seems like whenever I do, the universe laughs in maniacal glee and I land on my ass at the end of the year wondering what happened. But I'll tell you. After the past two years, who the hell hasn't? So here we go. 

Plans for 2022:

FINISH THE DAMNED BOOK. Yes. This would be book 4 of the SFR series. Shortly after I hand that book off to my editor (if she hasn't died of boredom or old age whilst waiting for it), I want to fast draft the final book in the series. Fast draft. FAST. I'm yelling at my brain. Not you. The goal is to have both books done in at least first draft form by the end of the year. Then, you see, I could move on to other projects that are knocking around in my brain. 

There are some assassins who want their stories finished. There's a story that isn't science fiction, fantasy, or paranormal. I'm not sure where it came from or who I am that the story even crept up on me. But I'll give it a shot. It feels important for some reason. There are myriad other stories that want to see light of day.

I have low daily word count goals at the moment. I'm doing the distance runner thing - logging a bunch of slow miles in order to get faster over time. (This will take you to a Tik Tok video about this very subject.) This is all a part of having to learn how to be alone while being constantly in other people's company. While pandemic and lock downs have been fine for many introverts, those of us living in houses full of people are not all right. Finding alone is harder than it sounds like it ought to be. And yes. It matters because I'm one of those people whose thoughts show on their face -- and there are just some scenes in books that get dark and terrible. Everyone in the household is happier if no one sees those thoughts as I think them. It turns out my family doesn't like it when I frighten them. 

Now. If you'll pardon me, I'm going to go make some word count on a book that needs finishing.

How I Became a Morning Writer

Our topic at the SFF Seven this week involves our writing schedules – what’s our most productive time of day, when do we actually write, how much time each day, week, month, etc.

I chose this photo I took of the moon at sunrise, because seeing amazing sights like this has become one of the great benefits of being an early riser. Who knew that catching the moon at dawn could be so very beautiful? I certainly didn't, because I was never naturally an early bird.

See, I was one of those who *loved* to sleep in. In the early days - and years - of our relationship, the hubs and I would sleep until 10 or 11am on the weekends. I'm groggy in the mornings, slow to come alert, and not particularly talkative. People ask me questions and I blink at them in incomprehension. Conversation, not so much.

BUT... I can write.

I discovered that mornings are my most productive time of day when that was the ONLY time of day I could consistently write. Those first few years after I committed to being a writer, I struggled - as many newbies do - to actually produce work. I had a busy life - a full-time career in science, two young stepchildren, debt we were determined to pay off (and did!), classes in the evenings (both taking and teaching) - and not a lot of "free" time. Waiting for that time to write to fall into my lap definitely wasn't working. Sandwiching in a bit of writing before I went to bed - delaying sleep when I was already exhausted - meant I got nothing done, very little done, or what I wrote was utter drivel.

I finally too the advice to write every day at the same time. I resisted that for years, but ultimately I knew I had to do SOMETHING different. So, I tried that, and it worked for me.

That meant, however, rising very early in the morning, because those dawn hours were the only ones when I had nothing else booked. I could write for an hour or two in the pre-dawn darkness, before anything else kicked in. That meant rising at 4 or 5am for a few years there. Some of the stuff I wrote then is pretty wild, but I built the writing habit, and it's stuck.

Now that I have the luxury of writing full time, I don't set an alarm. I get up when I wake up - usually after lying there for a while gazing dreamily out the window - and that's done wonders for me being actually alert when I'm on my feet. (I think when I made myself get up at a particular time, I wasn't always fully awake - thus my inability to process much in the way of conscious thought. I was upright, but I wasn't AWAKE.) I wake up between 5 and 7am, and mornings are devoted to writing, for the most part.

I find that if I can get my 3K words/day done by early afternoon, that's ideal. Generally I work in 1-hour sessions, with about a 30-minute break between. I'm not always good about keeping the breaks short, which I'd like to get better about in the new year. Most days I write 4-6 hours, with 3 hours of that actual fingers tapping on keyboard.

I'd really like to consistently get that down to 4 hours total, saving the time-sinks of chatting, social media, email, etc., for after the words are down. That's one of my goals for this year, so we'll see how I do!

Career Goals for the Established Author - a Work in Progress

Here's a little tease of the cover of THE FIERY CROWN, sequel to THE ORCHID THRONE, and book two in the Forgotten Empires trilogy. The full cover will be revealed on Wednesday, October 16, at Tor.com. There will also be a sneak peek of the first chapter!

Our topic at the SFF Seven this week is the big career goal to which we currently aspire.

It's an excellent question, particularly as phrased, because our career goals as authors do change over time. Recently a fairly new author concerned about their career trajectory implied that I shouldn't have concerns about my own career because I've "made it."

People, I wish I could count the number of times people have told me that I've "made it" in the last twenty-five years.

It's a common misperception that authors with an extensive backlist (which I do have), a loyal audience (thank you all!), and regular releases (which takes dedicated work) are somehow not reaching, even struggling. The vagaries of the publishing industry are kind to no one, and every author has their ups and downs. (As do agents and editors.) Not many of us have retired to Mediterranean villas to be waited upon by cabana boys while we pithily doodle out our next brilliant work.

So, it's an interesting question to pose to any author. What BIG goal do you aspire to RIGHT NOW? The answers may be surprising.

And note that we're specifying a big goal. It's tempting to say "finish this book I'm currently working on" - because that particular goal is all-consuming. In fact, we so often have our heads down, buried in finishing the current work, that we don't always pop our heads up to consider the big picture.

For me? I have a new book and series out on submission and I have a dollar figure advance in mind for it. If I get it, that will be a big, much-needed leap for me. A saltation in evolution, for those of you who know about those things. My other big goal is to hit a bestseller list, either USA Today or, ideally, New York Times. I never have and I'd really like to tag that particular brass ring. I'm hopeful that buzz for THE ORCHID THRONE - which has been really lovely and wonderful so far - will continue to build and that THE FIERY CROWN will have a shot at making those lists. It's looking more possible now that the NYT list added back mass market paperback

There, I've put those wishes out in the universe, which I rarely do publicly. Cross your fingers for me!

Leveling Up - What Does It Mean to You?

This week at the SFF Seven we're talking about leveling up and what that means to us.

Actually, the topic is phrased as: People always say they want to take their writing to the next level. Well, what are the levels, as you see them?

It's a really good question. I think we're trained - by school, and job performance appraisals, and so forth - to regard the work we produce in terms of levels. Ladders to climb, milestones to reach, levels of income, acclaim, and success. But is that really valid with creative endeavors?

I'm thinking no.

At the same time, however, we absolutely want to progress, to grow and do... more and better.

I've been doing a fair amount of mentoring, largely for SFWA but also answering questions for aspiring writers informally, and I find myself having the same conversation with all of them. At some point, I end up asking them to list out what they want from their writing careers. This is because my answers to the questions they ask - on whether they should try for this workshop or if it's time to look for an agent or countless other choices - all depend on what their priorities are.

Basically, there's no one career path for a writer. There are tons. And whether you prioritize making money to earn a living at it, whether you want to create ART (in capital letters), whether you want to win big awards, and so on, all of these things require different priorities.

So I ask these younger writers to make a list of the various categories:

• Financial
• Artistic
• Ego
• Altruistic
• Practical

They can add more, but those are mine that I came up a long time ago, to categorize my goals for my writing career. Then I ask them to list goals in each category. So they might look like this:

• Financial
• earn $70K/yr at least
• Artistic
• Write books I'm proud of and love
• Ego
• Win the PEN/Jerard award
• Altruistic
• Honor Grandmother & Papa's lives
• Practical
• Great agent for both fiction and nonfiction

These are actually the top goals in each category from my own list from a LONG time ago. I wouldn't make the same list now. Revising this list of priorities would be part of the process of leveling up.

So, I I know I'm not really addressing the question, which is really more craft-based. For that I'd say leveling up in my craft is pushing myself to write things I think I can't, to go for more complex and deeper-reaching stories.

But I also think that levels come in many forms, and what those levels are to each of us is tremendously personal. Maybe that's why we put this so vaguely, calling it "leveling up." Always reaching and growing, no matter what form that may take.

Chase your own dang goals, Writer-You

This week I can talk about anything I want to, so buckle up. This could get weird. Also personal. There might be swearing. You have been warned.

First, a confession: for the past, oh who knows how long, I've been in a slump. Not just one of those cute temporary "oh golly, I don't know what scene should go here" blocks but a solid half year of writing literally nothing. Of complete writer-brain paralysis. I'm coming out of it, with the help of a therapist, because as is so often the case with these things, a bunch of root causes grew up, choked the crap out of each other, and formed this constricting tangle.

One of those pesky roots was author goals. Or rather, other people's goals for me as an author.

My own goals starting out were pretty simple:

1. Have my partner read something I wrote and say it's good.

2. Have a stranger, someone I've never met and almost definitely am not related to, read my book and like it. 

3. Have enough success (that is, sales) that I don't have to assume a different pen name and start over, which I've heard authors anti-affectionately refer to as "re-branding." Note that I had no idea back then how to define "enough success."

So, my first book came out, and amazingly, #2 happened. Yay! My second book came out, and whoo-boy!  #1 happened as well. (Thank you, Conejo-my-love.)

My third book... er, so here's where things get sticky. Remember how I didn't have numbers for "enough success"? Remember how it was all vague and hand-wavy and trust-everything-will-turn-outish? That was a mistake. Huge. Because instead of defining my own goals--or my own identity, as a writer--I ended up chasing someone else's goal of sufficient numbers, sufficient success. I wanted to be successful enough that my publisher wanted to keep me on, right? 

But how much is that, numbers wise? How do you achieve it? What steps do you take to make that happen?

Problem was I let my success be defined by someone else's goals, without a clear understanding of what those goals were or what they entailed, and then I appropriated all of the guilt and horror when I failed to meet those goals. 

My identity had become dependent upon someone else's estimation of success.

This is a shit way to live, people. It's a worse way to work. However, I had a lovely eureka moment not to long ago where I was whining to the therapist about my failures and she asked me what specific goals I'd failed to achieved, and I told her and she asked me under what circumstances I'd set those goals and I was like... hold up. I didn't make them. They aren't mine. 

I never wanted to be a bestseller. I mean, it wouldn't have sucked, but I personally wasn't disappointed by a lesser splash on the scene. A writing career is a slow-burn love affair, right, not a hookup on page 1. Plus, I got goals number 1 and 2 right out of the gate, so I was good. 

Then therapist -- who is exceptionally wise, which is absolutely what I pay her for -- suggested I think up new ways of defining what Success as a Writer Means for Me. 

And it's this:

1. Success is that moment when I'm writing and my kid is reading over my shoulder and she laughs out loud at one of my jokes. (<--the BEST)

2. Success is writing "The End" on something, regardless of whether I have any intention of selling it ever.

3. Success is seeing hearts--or the odd "fucktacular!"--in the margins of my manuscripts after my critique partners have read a thing.

4. Success is making myself cry when I write a scene that's particularly difficult. Bonus if it ever makes someone else cry.

There will be other goals as I continue on this path through Writing Land. So far, I've gotten 1, 2, and 3 to happen and hope to replicate them. Number 4 eludes me, but it's something that is entirely within my control as a craftsperson and wordflinger.

And that's the trick, I think, to forming an identity as Yeah, I Really Am a Writer, Legit: making my own goals. Defining them clearly. Developing only goals that I have one hundred percent control over--i.e., not sales or reviews or awards. 

Sticking to it, focusing...

...and letting myself, sometimes, when no one else is looking, win.

Rejuvenation and Goal-Setting

The pattern of frost-filigreed wisteria vines is so lovely. The winter holidays are such a great season for rest and rejuvenation - and our weather in the high desert of New Mexico has obliged with lots of snow and freezing temperatures. All the better to keep me cozied indoors and focusing on both relaxing and giving my mind the room to mull thoughts for the coming year.

I did something a little different this year. Not on purpose, but because in those last few days before guests arrived for the holidays, I just couldn't keep my attention on work.

Instead of fighting that - I let it go.

I spent those couple of days baking, wrapping gifts - and even tandem watching schlocky Christmas movies with a long-distance friend. The upshot is I went into the actual holidays feeling rested and calm, instead of stressed. I'm going to do this every year.

In fact, front-loading rejuvenation time rather than relying on post-effort recovery time is going to be my compass concept for 2019.

The other thing that's happened is that I relaxed and rested enough that I started to get a little bored - which meant I was excited to take on some business tasks, yay! - and my mind wandered quite a bit, of its own accord, to ideas for the coming year. A big part of that is going to be reducing back log and lists.

Some of those things:

Maintain Inbox Zero

Some people can live with full email inboxes. I just can't. I tend to treat my inbox like a To Do list, which means the emails in there weigh on me as tasks that remain unfinished. Worse, emails that are more important, and thus require more effort, tend to languish in there for months, growing hopelessly stale or often forgotten entirely.

To change this up:

• I already emptied all of my email inboxes and will start the new year with Inbox Zero
• I will treat email with the one-touch principle - each email gets touched once and dealt with
• to do this I will either reply immediately or
• file emails and add any reply tasks to my To Do List instead
• I'll also continue to check email only a couple of times each day, and then only after I get wordcount

Revivify To Do List

Related to the above, I'm going to make my running To Do List, which I keep on an Excel spreadsheet, more relevant and active. I have that same syndrome where some tasks tend to linger on it for MUCH too long, sliding from one day to the next, until they build up so much inertia from Dread & Procrastination that they feel like insurmountable obstacles.

To change this up:

• I will minimize tasks that float for a long time by
• distributing tasks instead of clumping (i.e., if I have a list of things to do for SFWA, I'll put them over several days or weeks instead of all on one day, then moving them as I don't finish them.
• And if I do move a task, I'll break it up into smaller tasks, then distribute over several days
• I'll give larger, longterm tasks a category (I already have these, like Finances, Business, Errands, etc.) and subtasks until complete
• Everything gets this treatment, rather than having very large tasks on my list that float with no progress

Reduce TBR List

Back in 2015, I made a spreadsheet (of course I did!) of all the books in my possession that I hadn't yet read. It lists the format (digital or paper), date acquired, reason to read, etc. I add to it as I acquire new books. All the books that I had at the time I made the spreadsheet got a date of October 27-29, 2015, which were the dates I entered them. When I made the list, I had something like 280 books on it. Today I have 316 and 233 of those are from October of 2015. (To be fair, those represent YEARS, possibly DECADES of unread residency in my life.) This list can feel like a crushing unfinished task, however, so I'm resolved to deal with this backlog.

To change this up:

• I will read one of these 233 books for every newer book I read, alternating them.
• I'm reducing my 25% commitment (reading at least the first 25% of every book) to 10%. If I'm not wanting to continue by then, off it goes.
• In fact, I'm going to get ruthless about this decision-making. If the book isn't making me glow with delight and LONG to keep going, then it goes. 

I've got a few other goal sets on my list - on a spreadsheet, OF COURSE! - but they feel more personal. What about you all - anything you're looking to change up this year?

When goal-setting becomes counterproductive

I used to be a huge goal-setter and plan-maker. Once, during a 16-week technical writing contract that turned out to be pure agony -- I had to physically clock in and wear pantyhose, for the love of everything holy! -- I hand-drew a calendar and gleefully X'd out each completed day. So satisfying! Later, when I managed a department, I had to-do lists and calendars running for twenty or more projects at a time and felt like I was queen of the freakin universe. My personal planning during college was a thing of beauty.

But becoming a writer broke something inside my brain. (At least one thing, you might say.) I don't make plans anymore. I can't. It hurts too much.

As much as folks say you can't take anything personally in this business -- because it's, well, a business -- the near-constant barrage of failure can be traumatic. I've heard of writers making plans to have X number of releases or hit certain lists or write X number of words each day or earn enough to quit the day job, and I'm not saying don't ever do those things. What I'm saying is be prepared for your meticulously laid plans to go sideways with no warning and through no fault of your own. And be prepared for that to happen a lot.

Writing for publishers is notoriously out of writers' control. I've experienced publishers that went out of business, lines that were discontinued immediately after my story was released, publishers that spontaneously decided not to pay out royalties, one series that just stopped abruptly, crap sales, snarky reviews, and anthologies that languished sometimes for years after the contracts were signed.

At the beginning of this writing adventure, of course I made short-term, medium-term, and long-term career plans. I was the queen, remember? I wrote my goals down, affirmed them, created calendars and lists and committed myself whole-heartedly to gettin shit done.

And each time the industry spasmed and one of my stories -- one of my goals -- was affected, I would look at all those intricate plans and see only lists of failures. Irrationally but inevitably I decided these were my failures, and I owned them.

It's not easy to admit, but there were times when the failures became too much, too many, and depression crept in. My critique partner and I went through a lot of similar experiences and took to calling the big D "the pit." We'd text things like "Pit's deep today," and the other would reply with something like, "Yeah, but you're still good. I still believe in you."

So, I don't make goals anymore. I don't have plans in the detailed sense, save one:

I plan to write stories for as long as I am able and
make them available to whomever wants to read them. 

How precisely this master plan goes down is a wide open who-knows. And that's okay.

Sum Total of the Goals

I hope a bright and happy solstice was had by all and that the forthcoming holidays will also delight you and yours.

Do y'all remember back to January of this year? I only barely do. Apparently, I went on a rant against the abomination that is Western Civilization's obsession with New Year's Resolutions. It was my screed against listing out goals for other peoples' consumption and/or guilt-making. And though I was ranting against the load we seem to want to place upon ourselves with goals and resolutions and all manner of betterment (as if we aren't enough in and of ourselves) it turns out that ranting against goals is actually making them. They went something like this:

1. Pledge to be gentle with yourself - adopt a policy of nonviolence in thought, word, and deed concerning yourself. Seriously. Just listen to how you think at yourself. You will be horrified by what you hear.
2. Make time and space for doing nothing at all. It needn't be much time. Fifteen minutes a day. Not for meditation. Not for reading. Not for yet another course on how to do or be The Thing. To do nothing. Most of us have forgotten leisure and how to be alone.
3. Vow to help someone else. Whether you volunteer on a regular basis or just offer a cup of coffee to the homeless kid on the corner once in a while - totally up to you. But if you want the cure for a bad day, bring a smile to someone else's face.

How'd I do with these? Erm. Uh. Okay? I guess? The first one lasted for maybe a week before I fell back into old, nasty habit. I am still working on that. Too much research in the world proves that negative feedback does not produce results. Being mean and calling yourself names in your head does not do the job you want it to do. It produces little to no motivation. Positive motivations (having something to shoot for that matters to you) is far more productive. Reprogramming one's brain to DO that is not the easiest. Let's call this a work in progress.

I did nail the last two. Self defense on finding time to do nothing. Migraine sufferers know something about that - usually after a major migraine, you spend several hours, one the pain and sickness are gone, just looking around. Going through life gently. Yes. It is in fear of the migraine returning. But the point is that taking a few minutes each day to do nothing is now part of my self-care.

Helping someone else - Ballard has a population of homeless folks. You get to know who they are and you get to know their needs. So making sure that there are extra hot drinks on cold days, or a box of feminine hygiene products left for the young woman on the street with her partner - those things are easy to do. Supporting Best Friends and Big Cat Rescue with 10% of every dime I make is my other thing. But my favorite was seeing a young woman walking the street in the greatest, should be in a movie, velvet trench coat (bright scarlet). I was behind her and her friend. They went into a restaurant. I followed and touched her elbow. The two women turn to look at me. Faces blank. I said, "Truly epic coat." The gal's friend grinned, pumped her and crowed, "Told you!" The young woman in the coat lit up. Lit up so bright it brought tears to my eyes. Dumb, huh? But it happened. I liked that. Think I'll put it on my list for next year - to see if I can make someone's day like that at least once.

Looking Back at 2016 Goals

In a post dated 1/6/16 I noted my writing goals.

My 2016 goals are: 

1.) Finish Persephone #7.

2.) Hopefully spend some time doing the 'author/editor back and forth dance' on an unrelated fantasy novel that *should* come out fall of 2016.

3.) Finish and find a home for unrelated modern fantasy A or unrelated modern fantasy B. Or both. A has a good start, but short. B is 60% done...but the ending wasn't coming together...until, while watching a speculative TV show, something they said sparked a wild idea that over the course of an hour blossomed into the ending I'd been searching for.

Results:

1.) I did not finish Seph #7 but I have completed the plotting and did get it up to about 50k. I told people it would be out late 2016 or eaerly 2017, as my plan then was to self-publish. But other things have come into play with another publisher and until that is decided, no Seph. /sorry, I want it too!!!/

2.) I have done the dance. Publisher went through some internal changes to spring from just ebook to include print and distribution, so their pub dates were pushed back. I will do a cover reveal in the weeks to come for the book to be released in May 2017. -SQUEE-

3.) I have worked on both A and B and garnered some interest in both but, alas, I have no specific news to report on either.

While 2016 was not a rousing career related success, it was a spectacular success on the personal front.

At the onset of 2016, my goals seemed like a study of character internal and external motivations.

I was a single mom with a slightly-better-than-minimum-wage job with no hope of income growth. Although my workplace was a positive place to be, I was actively looking for something with better pay and benefits. I was also the only employed person in the house with two boys, a live-in mother and my nephew.

Something had to give and, honestly, it was me. It was always me. The octogenarian mother wasn't going to work. That was a no-brainer. The children weren't going to work. That only left me and a lot of weight on my shoulders. Looking back, I completely understand the inability to sleep and the depression.

My personal goals were:

Internal  I wanted love in my life. Someone to hold on to and be held by, someone to share everything: the good the bad, the laughter and the tears, the joy and the burdens.

External   I just wanted the time and focus to write well and the chance to continue building the career I wanted, the career I had for a time and seemed to have lost.

Neither seemed possible. Right after Christmas, with the taxes and the homeowners insurance bills looming, a leaking hole in the roof forced me to take some kind of action. After consideration, I had two options...and I pursued both. 1.) I worked two jobs in February and March. It felt like I would never get to write again...but people were fed and the house payment made, the leak fixed, and the heat was still on. That was most important, right? And 2.) I did something I didn't ever want to do: I hired a lawyer and sought child support for the first time. I had to assume that it would ruin the 'hospitable' relationship with the ex. With my boys "in the middle" that was not a decision I made lightly.

For the vast majority of creative people, this is the very thing that restrains: life and the the day-to-day responsibilities. Stress eats creativity like a ravenous animal with a delicacy -- no savoring, no consideration, just a one-gulp devouring of that stuff of dreams.

But I am stubborn. A writer is who and what I am. I cannot not write. But having touched the profession and being unable to maintaint my grip in that world left me feeling inadequate, fraudulent, and a failure. But, let me say it again, I am stubborn. I want what I want. And there are some things my spirit has not the capacity to give up.

That persistence served me well. Things began to turn around.

Concerning the external frontier, Ragnarok bought one of my older novels. It's been reworked a bit and will be released in May 2017. It is a story I am quite proud of.  The other books will be getting attention soon -- a lot of attention. I am once again in a position to write during a majority of my time. Now settled into the house and the new{old} routine, its all coming back to me.

Why? How? That al stems from the internal...

Concerning the internal frontier, a man I loved twenty years ago re-emerged into my life. This time, everything fell into place and fit like puzzle pieces. We got married and bought a house. It has been a whirlwind year, and I couldn't be happier (ok, well a NYT bestseller could make me happier, but yanno).

I love and am loved. I have met goals and made new ones. I know joy and I try like mad to spread it around. I wish this for you all, right now.

May you have the Merriest, Happiest, and Most Joyful Holiday with the people you love most around you, laughing, hugging, and making memories you will cherish.

2016 Goals - Hits, Misses and Surprises

As part of our end-of-year wrap-up, the SFF Seven are Looking Back on 2016's Goals: How'd We Do? What Was Our Biggest Deviation from the Goal or Plan? Why? Most Satisfying Accomplishment?

I always find it interesting to look back on what I thought would happen during the year, then compare it to what actually occurred - and try to parse why. It helps me plan for the coming year.

It was a particularly interesting year for me in that it was my first full year as a full-time writer. Since getting laid off in October 2015, my biggest goal was seeing if my husband and I could make it without me having to get another job. Our situation is compounded by the fact that he doesn't have a salaried job either. So this meant dealing with fluctuating incomes and me paying my own health insurance.

Biggest hit? Nailed it!

I almost can't believe, but we're making it. And things are getting better all the time. Whew! Huge win right there.

The biggest miss is that I thought I'd be able to write about 25,000 words/week. I had a good reason to believe I could, as 5,000 words/day is doable for me. Instead, the graphs look like this:

 While I did hit 20K/week a few times, my average for the year turned out to be about 7,000 words/week. Very surprising to me. In fact, my overall annual word count went down for the first time in four years.

Now, I still wrote over 400,000 words in 2016 (with a couple of weeks left), so I'm not beating myself up about it. I think a few things happened to account for this:

1. I blogged a LOT less, a number I had always included in my word counts. Some of this is because I quit a couple of group blogs that felt like they weren't doing much for me - a refocusing of effort on my part - but I also posted less to my personal blog. Conversely, I posted to social media more, word count numbers I don't track. This felt like a natural drift to me.
2. I taught more, which means stuff that I used to write for blog posts, I wrote for online classes, and I didn't track those word count numbers.
3. I spent more time on business and business-related activities.
4. I wrote in a more focused way, not playing around with stuff, but concentrating on producing specific stories.
5. I did a couple of major revisions, including revising an entire novel I would have been better off simply rewriting. That project accounts for the low word counts of August-October. 
6. I went to a lot more conferences.
7. It seems to continue to be true that I pay for high word-count productivity with rebound phases. I'm not sure I can escape that. Notice that my high-count weeks are followed by low-count weeks.
8. Finally, related to #7, I tried to be kinder to myself. If I needed to take days off, I did. For the first time since summers off as a kid, I didn't set an alarm in the morning, which meant I found my natural sleep calendar and that felt really good. In fact, my Fitbit graph shows a very interesting seasonal rhythm to my sleep cycle, which I had already suspected might be the case. 
   

The most satisfying accomplishment was also the surprise from 2016. I got serious about self-publishing, in order to establish a more regular income,

With the two-month lag in royalty payouts from retailers, along with time for me to get previous obligations handled, then new projects written and edited, the ramp-up was slow. But, once it kicked in, son of a gun, it worked! Having this option for authors makes a huge difference in whether we can make a living at this profession. 

I think the take-home from this is that we can set goals, but we can't always be sure what will really pay off. Which keeps life interesting!

Finally, to compare to what I set for goals at the end of 2015 in this post, I said:

1) in 2015 I made twice as much from writing as in 2014, but in 2014 I made five times as much as in 2013. Since I'm no longer working the day job, I *really* need to make a living wage from writing this year, so I really want that every-other-year thing to kick in. Five times what I made in 2015 would be awesome. Putting it out there.

I did not make five times what I made in 2015 - what a dreamer Past Jeffe was! - but I did make over twice as much. So, go me.

2) My agent has a book out on submission for a new epic fantasy series. It's a rework of the second novel I ever wrote and I love so much about it. In 2016, I want to either see it published or firmly in the publishing pipeline.

So did not happen. For Reasons. This is still a plan for 2017.

3) We're also going out on submission with a new contemporary romance, the first in a trilogy. That one is getting published in 2016, one way or another.

And... no. What it got was the Revision That Would Not Die. But it's a way better book now. My agent said: "Words cannot express how impressed I am with this new draft. You have taken something I thought was enjoyable and fun and turned it into something raw and meaningful and powerful." 

I'm still calling that a win. 
4) I have a third series that's been parked for over a year. The first one is going out in 2016 or it's in an amazing confirmed pipeline. Enough already.

Also did not happen, but mostly because I decided to back-burner it in favor of another project, which is the one that accounts for most of the self-publishing sales, so I think it was a good choice.

5) I'm making this last one vagueish. I have numerous plans. Hopeful plans to help secure the future for me and my hubs. This is the blogging equivalent of throwing my prognostication penny in the well of good fortune. I totally promise that, at the end of the year, I'll report back on what worked. But I'm too superstitious to unveil them beforehand.

Totally worked! Woo hoo!!!

For 2017, I'm mainly going to work on evening out my production. I'd like to see if I can consistently produce at 15,000 words/week, which works out to 3,000 words/day, which seems to be more sustainable for me. We shall see!

What about you all - what was a surprise win from 2016? Goals for next year??