How Far is Too Far?

 

One of the biggest questions many authors face when writing is how far is too far. Should I put a taboo topic in my book? Should I limit myself and stick to something that is considered safer? My answer is, write what you want. It’s okay to push boundaries. One of my all-time favorite quotes is “Be courageous and try to write in a way that scares you a little.”- Holley Gerth.

To me, there is something freeing in writing our dark truths. In my stories, you will find characters that deal with what many consider taboo topics, such as mental illnesses like depression, anxiety, PTSD, self-harm, and addiction; along with other taboo topics, such as miscarriage and premature birth. 

Why do I put these topics into my writing? Because I have mental illnesses. I have depression, anxiety, and complex PTSD. I have also struggled with self-harm. I know many who have struggled with addiction and other mental illnesses. I’ve experienced the heartbreak of miscarriages and the fear of delivering my twins at twenty-nine weeks, wondering if they would survive. Thankfully, they did, and they are thriving almost four-year-olds. I have close friends who struggled and still struggle with infertility. 

My point is that the chances that one of your readers has experienced the topic that would be considered too far is highly likely. I’m a survivor of abuse, sexual assault, and attempted rape. Many would say that’s too far, but I still put it in my stories because I know the chances that someone in my readership has also experienced it. 

It adds reality to our characters when we give them complex and real issues that many of us deal with. Many of us are forced to suffer alone and in the dark with such taboo topics because it’s considered too far to put in fantasy and paranormal, or really any romance. The reality is those things happen. There is nothing wrong with adding a realistic situation for your character to overcome. Having something that’s considered bad happen to your character doesn’t make them less worthy of love. In fact, it’s empowering to see a character overcome tragedy and still find happiness. 

As a reader, I love reading when a character has experienced something I personally have. It adds a depth to the character that helps me feel a little less alone in my struggles. This is exactly why I put these so-called taboo and too-far topics into my books. Breaking the stigma and helping someone feel a little less alone is worth whatever backlash I might get. 

For me as a reader and author, I don’t find anything taboo or too far in writing. Can there be misrepresentations? Absolutely, but that goes for TV and movies as well. It happens, and my best advice is that if you want to write a taboo topic that you have not experienced, do your research. Educate yourself to the best of your ability. You don’t have to have experienced something taboo to write about it. 

Writing is my therapy, so being able to express my past, my experiences, and my feelings helps me. I know many authors write for therapeutic purposes. It’s a wonderful and healthy outlet—just like how many read to escape their reality. They want that temporary break from their day-to-day, so they escape in the pages of a book. 

Not everyone is going to love your book or what you write, so put the topics you want into your story. At the end of the day, it’s your book, your story, and you can make it whatever you want. There will be someone who will be touched by your story, and that is what makes it worth it. Even if I touch one person with my stories, that’s enough for me. If I can make someone feel a little less alone in their struggles, then it’s worth it. 

Don’t limit yourself. The beauty of being an author is the world is what we create it to be. We can create complex characters with real issues that people struggle with and put them in an epic fantasy world. We can write a paranormal romance and have a werewolf who deals with self-conscious issues. We can have a female in a contemporary romance struggle with her body image. Just because it’s romance doesn't mean everything about the story has to be rainbows and butterflies. Characters can go through struggles and still have happy endings. I’m all for writing happily ever afters. 

Don’t censor yourself because even if it’s considered too far, the chances are someone won’t think of it that way. Write what makes you happy. Write the story you want the world to see because it’s your story, your world, your characters, and it’s up to write a story you love. 

Birdy Rivers is an award-winning author. She was born in NJ and now resides in GA with her family. She has been writing since her teens and professionally writing since her mid-twenties. When she isn't writing she is raising her twin girls and spending time with family and friends. Before Birdy became a full time Author and an Editor she worked as a Medical Assistant. She enjoys reading, the outdoors, gaming with hubby, and music. Music and writing have served as therapeutic measures for her depression and anxiety. Birdy is a huge mental health advocate and often features the struggles of mental health in her stories.

 

I'll do anything for story, but I won't do that

 Taboo, you say?

I'm not against leveraging a good taboo now and then. Have done, in fact. Certain cultures have a taboo against writing anything into the skin. Tattoos are equated with magic spells etched into your body that have to pull their energy from somewhere. I definitely used that in the Nightmare Ink books. How could I not? It lends itself so well to 'what if' and to imagining the unintended consequences of flouting the taboo. That's tasty stuff and I did my best to respect the cultures that hold that taboo to this day. It's important to me that my characters face down whatever chaos results from the choices they make.

But.

I draw a personal line at taboos that hurt or exploit innocents. Want me to hurt animals? You can piss right off. You'll always be able to read my stuff with the assurance that the dog will not die. In my world, some taboos deserve to remain untouchable forever. I feel like the line between taboo and kink is informed consent. Taboo is about victimizing someone. Kink is about having a good time while playing with the edges of what's deemed acceptable by society. Based on that, I'm pretty dead set against breaking taboos in my stories unless doing so drives my point of view characters. My mains characters knew what they signed up for when they volunteered for a story. They get what they get. I'm going to do my best to push them past what they think of as their limits. I'm going to do damage that they have to either recover and grow from or wither and die from. But handing over some innocent bystander to a bad guy for some taboo breaking simply for shock value or to 'show' you how bad my bad guy is? No thanks. First, there are taboos that do not bear thinking about in any way, shape, or form. If I hate the whole notion of certain taboos, I'm not going to write them. There are too many other ways to get at what I need to motivate characters to change. Second, there are taboos that aren't a part of my experience and I do not have the authority to speak to them or represent them in fiction. I might not be able to get inside of those taboos to comprehend what purpose the taboos serve. By that I mean that most taboos are protective - they're meant to stave off harm to individuals, a clan, a culture, or a society. I had a boss who had immigrated from Iran explain that the prohibition against pork in his culture was a protective measure against trichinosis. That's understandable. An example of a taboo I can't understand is a current Tik Tok semi-comedic, semi-horror meme. It comes from Appalachia where the saying is "If you hear someone call your name from the woods, no you didn't."  I understand the intent - to protect you from vanishing into the wild never to be seen again. Whether it's bug or feature, though, I don't comprehend it because I lack the imagination to grasp not having a modicum of power over what happens to me when I walk into the woods to investigate something I heard. This taboo isn't my story to tell. I lack the mindset and experience of people who grew up with grandmothers who drilled the taboo into their heads.

Yes. I'd probably be one of the first to die in a horror movie, killed because I foolishly rolled my eyes at a taboo I couldn't wrap my brain around. 

A Bridge Too Far: Taboos in Fiction

 

       

 

Thanks to all the wonderful readers for their enthusiastic reception of SHADOW WIZARD! Just because it's so squee-worthy, here's a fabulous Reddit Gush about the book. Made me very happy!

This week at the SFF Seven, we're asking about limits. How far is too far in your writing? Is there anything you find taboo?

I think these are two different questions. I mean, they're literally two different questions, but I think the consideration of what is "too far" for me vs. what I find taboo are not the same at all. 

George R.R. Martin once told me about one of his favorite writing exercises to assign when he teaches workshops. He'd ask the students to write about the worst thing they ever did. Some, he said, were clearly fictionalizing. And others couldn't seem to come up with anything that terrible - which he figured for another sort of denial. But the point of the exercise was to demonstrate that all people - and thus all characters - can do really awful things. I mulled this over, and the conversation has clearly stuck with me, and I'm pretty clear that I do have places I won't go in my writing.

Some of the reactions to SHADOW WIZARD that I've seen remark on how awful some of the high houses in the Convocation are. In fact, some readers tap out on the world altogether, because it is so dark. I want to show in my work what absolute power does to people - it's a recurring theme for me - so perhaps I'm not so different from GRRM in that perspective. I have shown sexual abuse to the point of rape on the page, so that's clearly not too far for me. I won't show the death of a child or an animal-friend, however. That's just because it's too much sorrow for me. 

As far as taboos, however... I have a workshop I sometimes teach on writing sexual tension, and I delve heavily into taboos, especially as they apply to sex. In short, taboos exist in society for good reasons - they are instilled in us as children to protect our health (no dessert before dinner) and safety (don't touch the hot stove) and later they come from our larger communities to protect us all (murder is wrong). Because taboos are so deeply ingrained in us, breaking them releases a huge amount of emotional and spiritual energy. It's freeing to break taboos - which is why breaking sexual taboos (which often don't exist for very good reasons) can be so healthy.

The great thing about fiction is you can break all the taboos you want to! It's exhilarating for the writer and the reader. There's a reason we love kick-ass characters who kill with glee and ease. That releases the same energy in us as breaking the murder taboo, but without social or personal consequences. So... is there anything taboo for me in fiction? 

Probably not. 

How Far is Too Far?

This week's topic at the SFF Seven is how far is too far in your writing? Is there anything you find taboo?

First of all, let me say that this is a pretty complex topic if you sit down and really think about what taboo means across different cultures and how it can be used in fiction as a means to examine our own societal 'norms,' boundaries, and structures. When placed in the hands of a skilled and careful writer, taboo can be explored and provide an entirely different view of something we might otherwise never think about or understand.

Taboo by definition is: proscribed by society as improper or unacceptable.

The list for taboo subject matter could go on for ages, because everyone is different in what they find improper or unacceptable. For me, there are definitely lines that I don't think I will ever cross, like rape and incest. I can't make myself watch Game of Thrones, and those are some of the reasons why. For me as a viewer, it's just not something I want to see. I will also never watch Dahmer, no matter what anyone says, because that's too real for me. However, show me The Walking Dead with people getting eaten by zombies, and I'm just fine *shrugs.* 

One of the most recent taboo things I read was a scene in Empire of the Vampire by Jay Kristoff, a book I will finish if it kills me. There's a newly emerging vampire-type situation for a character and his menstruating girlfriend. Menstruation isn't as taboo in the US as it is in some other countries, but it's still often viewed as an unclean part of a woman's life, especially in sexual situations. In Kristoff's hands, this scene read like poetry, you guys.

Salt and iron. Autumn and rust. Flooding over my tongue and answering every question I’d never known how to ask. Because the answer was the same. Always the same. Blood. Blood.

Kristoff, Jay. Empire of the Vampire (p. 37). St. Martin's Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. 

And then, then God help me, I sank my teeth into her, her back arching, her every muscle taut as she threw back her head and pulled me closer, trying not to scream. And I knew the color of want then. And its color was red.

Kristoff, Jay. Empire of the Vampire (pp. 37-38). St. Martin's Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. 

I think writing is about pushing limits. It's about exploring darknesses along with the light. It's about discussing what lives in the shadows and what we as a society force into the shadows. It's also about tearing down social constructs that don't fit us as individuals and illuminating hate that just so happens to wear the clothes of taboo. Sorry, but religion doesn't get to decide what's right and wrong for all. 

I could talk for days on this topic haha, but I won't. Instead, I'll leave you with an article by Vylar Kaftan that explains the importance of writing the taboo far better than I ever could.

Here's an excerpt:

Taboos fascinate many writers and artists because we are rebels at heart. We’re drawn to the forbidden, the denied, the unacceptable. In order to show the world in all its beauty and grossness, we portray both the sacred and the profane, sometimes in the same sentence (holy shit, it’s true!). Many speculative fiction readers also find taboos fascinating, because they show what is different or excluded in humanity. A good percent of science fiction fans already feel quirky or weird compared to the ordinary world; it’s hardly surprising that stories about taboos often appeal to these readers. In this article, I’ll discuss briefly the nature of taboos and why speculative fiction is uniquely well-suited to handle these topics.

What's the last taboo topic you read about?

~ Charissa

Third Rail or Manipulation?

If you're old enough to remember seeing Jaws for the first time (while the CGI and special effects still held up) do you recall whether or not you were traumatized by watching blood spread in the water as people were ripped to shreds by a pissed off shark? I know it's hard to take seriously after nearly a half dozen Sharknado movies, but Jaws was pretty damned trigger-y for its day. Lots of people DID NOT go back in the water after watching that film. Because the movie touched what was a hot button at the time: killing innocent little kids in brutal fashion and showing it on screen. Well. And maybe because our animal brains have a thing about being snuck up on and messily devoured. The thing is that you can look at the film today and see how manipulative the scene with the boy is. It didn't really further plot. It was included solely to illicit horror from an audience and maybe to erase any sneaking sympathy you might have had for the shark. You can dissect the visuals from the John Williams score and neither works quite as well. Combined they are a masterstroke of manipulation.

You see where I'm going with this. Third rails topics generally feel manipulative to me - as if they're being brought into a piece of fiction, not because it's the only way to move the plot, but because it's shock value trying to dress in the grown up clothes of 'but this issue is important!'  That's not always the case, but I do find well done hot button topics are rare. Ursula K. Le Guin is a master at third rail topics. So is Margaret Atwood. Both, I think, are masters because the hot button issues are understated. Almost hidden. They underpin the world and the story, they're sort of the skeleton the stories hang on, but the stories being told aren't necessarily about religion specifically or what constitutes sexual deviancy. They're more about what become of humanity under the influence of those things.

On my more egotistical days, I say I want to be like the aforementioned ladies when I grow up as an author. The rest of the time, I acknowledge that might not be in this lifetime. :D IF there's a topic that gets a lot of knee jerk reaction and I want to pin a story on those bones, I do it. But not so I can trot out some bleeding edge attempt to be literarily relevant. It's because some tiny aspect of that hot button topic fires my imagination and infuses a set of characters with wild, weird life.

Certainly, it's my job to as respectful and careful as possible when I create a character who'd been adopted into the Navajo Nation but who was not, herself, Navajo. It wasn't done with an intent to be culturally insensitive - but I am not Navajo either, and an argument could be made that - because I'd written about certain traditions and beliefs unique to the Navajo as a means of heightening my heroine's identity crisis - I am touching the fiery hot third rail of cultural appropriation. Does that sentence even scan? It makes sense in my head. That may not be a good thing. In any case. I did my utmost to not be appropriative and to respect the beliefs and taboos that informed the culture my heroine grew up in but couldn't be a part of. I still had a massive case of nerves when the book came out, wondering if I'd get myself electrocuted or not.  (This is Isa from Nightmare Ink.)

And you know, what scares the crap out of me to write, may be totally mundane to some other author. I do suspect that third rail topics are subjective. Unless an editor stands up at a panel and says, "Incest. Brothers in bed in bed together? You guys have GOT to stop sending me that shit." Then yeah. That's for real third rail and that rail is electrified.